Gratitude turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, confusion into clarity…it makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow. Melody Beattie
Today I am going deeper into my gratitude process. I am grateful for memories coming up to be healed. This morning I woke up to thoughts about my childhood dog, a sweet little Maltese-like mutt named Mickey. I remembered when I had been driving in the back seat of my mom’s car as a teen. I had out with friends and had been estranged from my family for a few weeks. When I began talking about Mickey and asking how he was doing, my mom told me that she had put him down (he was 14 years old and had been ill). At that time I felt incredible guilt for not being around in my dog’s last weeks. I have held that guilt about what I saw as abandoning my sweet dog for decades. This morning I saw this memory in a different light. I saw it through the eyes of a compassionate and unconditionally loving parent to myself. I began the journey of forgiveness for both myself and my mom. I saw that we were both doing the best we could at the time. I began my forgiveness practice by telling myself the things I had needed to hear that day in the car:
I am so sorry.
I am sorry for your pain.
I am sorry that happened to you.
I am sorry she did that.
You did the best you could.
You loved him enough.
He knew you loved him.
And so on.
Then I sent love to everyone involved including my furry friend in Heaven. I am very thankful for this memory and this healing process. Through surrendering allowing my feelings with compassion and unconditional love I found forgiveness and healing.
Much Love,
Peace Goddess